Like you were walking on to a yacht

I have a discount card for a cash & carry place that sells UV lamps and sunbeds - (don't ask why). Think of it as a 'Sunshine Shop' and due to some design work I did for them I got a 50% discount card, which to me is generous considering I also got paid for the work I did, even though a mate of mine, Sid who also did some work for them a couple of years before me got a 75% discount card.
I'm pragmatic about these things, policies change and it is what it is.

Recently Sid lost his discount card in a dog (don't ask) and when he went to the Sunshine shop for a replacement he was told if he has a new one it'll only be for 50% discount. Secretly I was a little chuffed, I mean my work was easily as good as his and possibly more valuable, besides I never broke any of the lamps in the shop - but he did.

He was upset about his discounted discount and kicked up a right stink, the manager said "OK OK, you can have one more 75% item but that's it!" and Sid did the oddest thing, he chose the most expensive lamp the shop had and used his 75% on that!

Now, I hear you say "so what?, he gets a massive discount on his sunshine lamp, saves him loads". On the surface yes but as I watched the manager walk away with Sids money rubbing his hands together and grinning I began to think, Sid would have never bought that lamp on any other occasion, not when you think that this Sunshine Shop sells normal lamps at hugely inflated prices (compared to its competitors) and even then when you use your discount they add back on a weird "we honestly didn't see that coming" tax of £150 plus a single lamp supplement of £80. So in the end, on a day when Sid didn't even want a lamp let alone an expensive one he paid £480 quid for a £1000 Sunlamp just so he could say "yeah but it only cost me £480"
Thats £480 more than I spent.


Don't get me wrong I'll buy a lamp soon, but a modest one cos when it comes down to it its just UV right? It's the bulb not the package it comes in that is of value, I wonder how many other people have bought over priced lamps when they didn't really need to? I heard some girl bought a cheap one for £100 just so she could say she got 75% off, but its a pile of shit and she already has loads of really expensive ones! I just don't get it.

I bet the manager of that Sunshine Shop is laughing all the way to the bank!
"Financial troubles, what financial troubles?"

The Reprisalizer

If anyone out there remembers Garth Marenghi's Darkplace or is a fan of Matthew Holness - as I am - you will be as excited - as I am - to learn of a new(?) thing of his. The Reprisalizer.
Info is sketchy about it but it's looking like a feature length film based on a short Mr. Holness made in 2011 called 'A Gun for george', seems it follows a similar theme to Darkplace, a trashy but deadly serious writer of pulp novels, this time, Terry Finch who has similar character traits to his main character, Bob Shuter, a lone vigilante seeking vengeful reprisal for the death of his brother at the hands of scum.
In Kent.

The best bit about this so far is the website, viral marketing as it should be, check it out...

http://thereprisalizer.com/The_Reprisalizer/About.html

"Bob Shuter was a normal newspaper kiosk vendor until gangsters electrified his twin brother's testicles by car battery. Now he's The Reprisalizer, a savage street-tough vigilante riding a red hot trail of vengeance through the urban hell of Thanet"